Amazon’s ‘Modern Love’: When Should You End a First Date?

Amazon’s latest series, ‘Modern Love’ tells the love stories of different couples. In the first episode we see the main characters awkwardly ending a first date. They try to go in for a kiss as the doorman for the main character’s building looks on. What’s the best way to end a first date? Here’s what the dating experts told Showbiz Cheat Sheet.

Keep it at 90 minutes, tops

The cast of Amazon's Modern Love | David Livingston/Getty Images
The cast of Amazon’s Modern Love | David Livingston/Getty Images

The bottom line on first dates is that you should only stay for 60 to 90 minutes no matter how well the first date is going. First date length does not determine if there is going to be a second date. When people judge the length of the date as to the level of interest, they are making a dating mistake.

Stefanie Safran, founder of Stef and the City

Try a first “meet” instead of a first date

Christin Miloti of Amazon's Modern Love |  Theo Wargo/Getty Images
Cristin Milioti of Amazon’s Modern Love | Theo Wargo/Getty Images

I always recommend, especially in the online dating world, to have a first meet instead of a first date. This is a 20 to 30-minute coffee, walk in the park, glass of wine, museum gallery visit.  This allows us the time to either have the curiosity sparked to want to know more about this person or not, whilst taking all the pressure of a first date, or feeling trapped into a one to two-hour dinner date. If you are on a first meet that is going really well, I always recommend keeping to the timeline, leave both of you wanting to know more, and the date on a high. Schedule in date two, right then and there!

Learning how to get out of a bad or dud date, is an empowering tool.  You do not have to tough it out.  We think this is the kind thing to do, however its actually unkind to you and your date. I coach people to start with a positive feedback, something you liked about that person or the date, then follow with something like, ‘I’m not feeling the spark I need to stay, and do not want to waste your precious time or my own.  Let’s call it a night.’ More often than not, if there really isn’t the initial spark of chemistry, your date feels it too, and may very well be trying to tough it out too. 

Jessica Elizabeth Opert, Certified Relationship Coach

Go with your gut feeling

There’s no right or wrong time to end a first date. Most of the time you’ll both just get the feeling that it’s time to wrap it up. Don’t be afraid to end the date while you’re still having a good time – if you’re having a good time, and to be clear if you’re not! The first few dates of a relationship set the tone for what’s to come, so either leave things on a sweet note, or cut your losses without dragging it out.

Adina Mahalli, certified relationship expert, mental health consultant for Maple Holistics, and founder of Enlightened Reality

Make your exit when things are going well

You know it’s time to end the first date when things are going sideways. Either there isn’t a connection, the person is drinking too much, or just talking about themselves.

Dawn Burnett, CSA, Transformational Divorce Coach, wellness strategist, and founder of A New Dawn Natural Solutions, Inc.

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