‘DWTS’: Hannah Brown Says She And Partner Alan Bersten Really Need To Work On Communication

Hannah Brown’s made a career out of being a reality TV star, first on The Bachelor, then The Bachelorette, and now on Dancing With The Stars. One of the reasons she is so deeply adored by the public is that she’s a great, open communicator. Whether she’s speaking candidly to her Instagram following or giving an interview, she’s always honest.

Alan Bersten and Hannah Brown | Eric McCandless via Getty Images
Alan Bersten and Hannah Brown | Eric McCandless via Getty Images

In her most recent DWTS diary she wrote for Bustle, Brown, very openly, discusses some of the communication struggles she and her dance partner Alan Bersten have been experiencing. In her entry, Brown details the week leading up to her Paso Doble performance.

A tough week of rehearsals for Hannah Brown

She describes learning the dance and “feeling a little bit out of sorts; I was having a really sad day.”

Brown doesn’t think Bersten understands her anxiety and depression. She doesn’t blame him, but the block gets in the way of them effectively communicating.

“Hearing 5, 6, 7, 8, Hannah, hips! — not that Alan’s trying to yell at me — it hurts. I’m not trying to take it personally, but I’m really sensitive today. It’s not really something that I think Alan deals with and understands, and I don’t think I would understand it if I didn’t struggle with depression and anxiety,” she wrote.

Brown also writes about how frustrating it is to try and work through issues, whether dance or communication-based, on camera.

“I was upset because I couldn’t remember it and Alan was being pretty hard on me. I know he’s not intentionally trying to hurt my feelings — he’s not really yelling at me, he’s telling me to get the dance right — but it still is a lot, especially when I am wanting to get it right, too. We had a few moments where we had to take some breaks and work through it, and I think a lot of the emotion was coming from constantly having the cameras on,” she wrote.

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The beast is back. This time, in the ballroom.

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On their ride home from rehearsal, Bersten asked Brown what was wrong.

“I was silent because I don’t really know how to describe it. Yes, he’s been on reality TV and on Dancing with the Stars, but he hasn’t dealt with the ramifications of reality TV like I feel like I have. It’s hard to really get him to understand why it might just seem like Oh my god, you’re just getting emotional about nothing,” she wrote.

“But we had a good talk, and went to Erewhon and ate some food,” Brown continued.

Then came the first camera blocking rehearsal. Brown was surprised at just how steep the ramp she was going to dance on was.

“I was like, I’m not doing that, and [Alan] was like, No, go. Those are times where we really have to work on communication. I think he’s seeing that and hopefully trying to adjust, because after our last blocking I knew he was going to be mad at me and yell at me, and I just couldn’t handle it,” she wrote.

Brown left the rehearsal feeling defeated.

“I knew I could have done better, but I was more just scared to hear what he had to say about it being bad, and that’s not good. He’s actually really nice, but he doesn’t always build my confidence. I think he really realized that after the last pass doing camera blocking,” she wrote.

Hannah Brown and Alan Bersten are learning to communicate

When Brown got home, Bersten gave Brown a call.

“I think that was the first time I really truly felt that he was understanding of how I’m feeling. It wasn’t me having to dissect it for him; he knew exactly how I felt, but it was hard for him to adjust as well,” she wrote.

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dance break. @dancingabc ✨

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By the time the pair performed, Brown felt there was a notable “difference in Alan today in how he’s communicating with me and I’m communicating with him.”

Their performance went well and Brown’s excited to head into Disney week–she’s hoping she either gets to be a princess or Sully from Monsters Inc.

Read more: Colton Underwood Thinks Hannah Brown Is ‘A Completely Different Person’ After Her Time On ‘The Bachelorette’