17 Messed Up Places to Play ‘Pokemon GO’
The free-to-play game Pokemon GO has taken off like a rocket on mobile. It takes a series that was previously locked mainly on Nintendo handheld devices and brings it to nearly anyone with a smartphone. The thrust of the game is that Pokemon are everywhere out in the world, and you can find them using your phone. That means you actually have to go outside into the real world to add Pokemon to your collection. It’s a great concept, and people seem to be having a blast with it. But it’s not all fun and games.
That’s right, Pokemon GO has a dark side. Since Pokemon can show up anywhere in the world, they’re bound to show up in some seriously inappropriate places. We’ve been scanning the internet to find instances of Pokemon appearing where they most certainly should not. Here they are.
1. At a funeral
It seems that Pokemon like to hang out in funeral homes, lightening the mood cast by the death of a beloved friend or family member. Unfortunately, catching ‘em all isn’t a socially acceptable form of mourning. Not yet, anyway.
2. At the hospital while your wife is in labor
Let’s say your wife is in the process of giving birth to your child. It’s true that bringing new life into the world entails a good deal of waiting, but that doesn’t necessarily mean soon-to-be fathers should hunt for Pokemon between contractions.
3. On the toilet
We’re all friends here, so it’s OK to admit that you use your phone in the bathroom. So do many Pokemon GO players. And wouldn’t you know it, but Pokemon just love hanging out in bathrooms around the world. Maybe they ate some bad Taco Bell or they over-imbibed last night. Either way, here’s Abra dropping a deuce.
4. Near dead bodies
County 10 reports that this poor young Wyoming woman was out on a Pokemon hunt, trying to find a critter near a natural water source, where Pokemon like to hang out. That brought her to Wind River, where she noticed a body floating in a river. Yikes.
5. While driving
Driving while playing Pokemon GO is all fun and games until the inevitable fatal accident caused by a Pokemon trainer. Don’t play and drive, kids.
Even the Washington state Department of Transportation has chimed in to remind drivers not to play the game behind the wheel. Apparently it’s a problem.
6. Ground Zero
Pokestops are real-life locations you can drop by to pick up some eggs or Pokeballs. They’re set up in all sorts of places, but did they really have to put one at the 9/11 Memorial Pool at Ground Zero? Apparently when it comes to Pokemon GO, literally nothing is sacred.
7. While being pulled over
Officer, I don’t want to alarm you, but there’s a Rattata by your foot and it doesn’t appear to be in a good mood.
8. Westboro Baptist Church
You know that awful group of people who show up to picket at funerals? Turns out Pokemon GO decided they deserve to run a Pokemon gym. Probably best to avoid that one.
9. Drinking your liquor
That’s my Fireball, Oddish!
10. At a strip club
Sirens is a strip club located in Columbus, Ohio. According to Pokemon GO, it’s also a Pokestop. You can practically see the look on parents’ faces when their kids request they swing by Sirens, just for a second, no big deal. Need those Pokeballs.
11. Towering over cars
And you thought Godzilla was scary. Just wait until you look out your window to see a giant Squirtle stomping through your downtown. The creatures in Pokemon GO might not look as realistic as they do in the commercial, but that won’t matter when they’re 40 feet tall and coming for you.
12. Ruining a baseball game
Sure, baseball can be a slow game, but for the love of all that is holy, don’t play Pokemon GO during a match. You never know what enormous monstrosity you’ll unleash on the players and crowd.
13. When Satan rules a church
Did Pokemon GO just start the apocalypse?
14. Attacking a pet
Please, Rattata, leave fluffy alone.
15. Wherever you’re unwanted
The game must have labeled this Dairy Queen a gym and brought all kinds of non-paying gamers to the store. The owners have had quite enough of that nonsense. Buy a Blizzard or leave without a Bulbasaur.
On the other hand, some places are pleased with the extra foot traffic, like this church.
16. Near a dead rat
Rattata, I’m so sorry for your loss.
17. At a police station
Police officers have very important jobs. That didn’t stop the game from setting up a Pokestop there, drawing so many players that the department had to politely inform its citizens that they don’t actually have to enter the building to catch the Pokemon.