Why Gisele Bundchen Once Thought of Herself as a Terrible Mother
You know Gisele Bundchen as the beautiful supermodel and wife to star Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. And though she’s nearly 40 now, she still holds herself with as much effortlessness and grace as she always has. From childrearing to holding down the household (even after Brady suffered crushing defeats during the Super Bowl), she’s always had fans convinced she knows exactly how to lead a successful lifestyle.
Now, Bundchen is coming forward with some confessions of her own. In her memoir, Lessons: My Path to a Meaningful Life, she reflects on motherhood in a serious way. She even mentions a time when she didn’t consider herself a good mom.
She has two kids with Tom Brady
When it comes to celebrity couples that have lasted through thick and thin, Brady and Bundchen are at the top of the list. Business Insider notes the two met back in 2006, and by 2009, they were married. Now, they live right outside of Boston with their two kids, Benjamin (8) and Vivian (5).
Their family situation wasn’t always picture-perfect, however. Just a little over two months after the couple got together, Brady’s ex, Bridget Moynahan, revealed she was pregnant with Brady’s son. And while this put significant strain on his relationship with Bundchen at the time, they got through it together. Now, Bundchen has a very close relationship with Brady’s 11-year-old son, Jack, too, People reports.
Bundchen said she felt as if she lost her independence after having kids
Bundchen notes she always knew she wanted to become a mother, People reports. But she wasn’t necessarily prepared for the severe transition from complete independence to motherhood. “I’d been this very independent person. It was all about me. But now I had this little being, and I suddenly felt l couldn’t do other things and that was very hard for me,” she said. “When I became a mom, I kind of lost myself. It was like a part of me died.”
She’s learned that in order to be a good mother, she has to take care of herself, too. CNN notes in an interview with The Sunday Times, Bundchen said, “You know how they say on the plane you have to put the oxygen mask on first and then put it on your child? So I think it is the same, as a mum, to take care of myself.”
She even considered herself to be ‘a terrible mother’
Bundchen has come to terms with the fact that she must put herself first in order to be her best self for her children. “You can feel a bit guilty. But if I put my oxygen mask on first, if I’m feeling fulfilled and present and good about myself, then I’m going to be a much more patient, loving, understanding mother and wife. You have to fill your glass so that everyone can drink from it,” she told The Sunday Times.
But it wasn’t always this way. In the beginning of motherhood, People notes she often thought of herself as an awful mother for leaving her kids at home while she was out on jobs. And when she would bring her kids with her on work trips, she’d also feel guilty about that, too. And the stress of being a mom also negatively impacted her marriage.
Their marriage hit rough times, but she and Brady are stronger than ever now
People notes Bundchen recalled feeling totally overwhelmed by motherhood — and her husbands 12-hour daily training schedule didn’t help. She also noted a particular time when her and Brady were in different countries, and she received an angry email from him that made her upset. Instead of sending back a heated reply, she wrote her hurt feelings on paper and burned them. Then, she told Brady that when he was ready to continue the conversation in a respectful way, they could work it out together. It seems that did the trick.
“When someone you love is happy, it makes you happy, or if they’re sad it makes you sad. You suffer with them and you have joy with them,” Bundchen said. Today, she and Brady have learned how to navigate each other’s feelings and keep their love going strong — and she certainly doesn’t carry the same parenting guilt she once did.
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