The Subtle Ways You’re Sabotaging Your Marriage Without Realizing It

No one wants to think about their marriage ending. But as statistics indicate, many of them do. And between financial problems, infidelity, and other factors, there are plenty of serious issues that can ruin a relationship. But what’s scary is that there are also subtle cues as well.

Even if you don’t mean to, you could be slowly sabotaging your marriage through little things. If a lot of these points resonate with you, you may want to start doing some damage control.

You bring outside stress into the relationship

angry co-workers

Don’t take your frustrations from work out on your partner. | iStock.com

Life is stressful, and some of that stress will naturally come home with you at the end of the day. But if you let it overwhelm you, you can start disconnecting from the relationship, or worse, take it out on your partner. Find healthy outlets for your stress and spare your sweetheart from the fallout.

You’re obsessed with social media

Attractive young woman using a smartphone and texting while laying on a massage bed at a spa

Put the phone down. | iStock.com/Antonio_Diaz

While there’s nothing wrong with having a Facebook account or scrolling through your Instagram feed every now and then, there are several ways excessive social media use can wreak havoc on a relationship. It could make you compare yourself unfavorably to others, experience envy, or take up time that should be spent connecting with your other half.

You criticize more than you encourage

Couple touching noses

Choose your words wisely when talking to your partner. | Monkeybusinessimages/iStock/Getty Images

While it’s natural to want to encourage your spouse to be at their best or become frustrated when your expectations aren’t being met, the fact is, your words have the power to either build up or tear down your mate. Choose them wisely.

You subtly bash your spouse

young couple in the morning

How do you talk about your spouse amongst your friends? | iStock.com/Ivanko_Brnjakovic

Do you make jokes about your spouse to your friends or make subtle passive aggressive digs? This is a great way to build resentment. While no one is denying that your other half should be called out on certain tendencies, make sure you balance out any negative feedback with something positive. You also deserve that same respect from your spouse.

You take things personally and make them about you

Couple paying bills online at home

Don’t take everything so personal. | iStock.com/CreativaImages

Taking things personally is human nature, but the truth is, someone else’s behavior is rarely about you. That’s why it’s a waste of time and energy to demonize your partner’s actions and make them about you. Instead, choose to empathize — this doesn’t mean justifying any bad behavior, but if you take it personally, you’ll only close off communication and make problem-solving impossible.

You assume your partner will be there forever

Young Couple Moving In To New Home

You should never take your partner for granted. | iStock.com/monkeybusinessimages

Every marriage has its ups and downs. But if you put off making time for, or reconnecting with your spouse, you might regret it. Assuming you can always reconnect when your children are older or when your work slows down is a bad plan. Keeping a close connection is crucial.

You keep putting other people or things ahead of your marriage

Young couple playing video games

Video games should not come before date night. | iStock.com/nazarovsergey

While having a life outside of your marriage is healthy and normal, the fact is, a relationship needs nurturing and ongoing care if you want it to thrive. If you continue to be distracted by your unfinished business, new ventures or other people, you could create an unhealthy distance in your union.

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