This Disturbing Sign Means It’s Time to Cut a Family Member out of Your Life

It’s no secret that cutting a family member out of your life is not an easy decision to make. Severing ties with a friend or acquaintance can be hard enough, but a family member? This is one of those decisions that no adult wants to make. You might even make excuses for why you shouldn’t distance yourself from your kin.

There are a plethora of reasons you might have to make this difficult decision. But there is one sign that definitely signals it is time to cut off a family member.

For starters …

Family watching television in a living room.

Your vision of a “perfect family” might not exist at all. | Vadim guzhva/Getty Images

Truthfully, not all family members get along. That’s just a fact of life. Getting into a disagreement with a parent or cousin happens to just about everybody. In most cases, there are ways you can figure out how to get along better. In some cases, however, it could be better for you to cut the cord.

Next: The signs that might tip you off

These signs might tip you off

A woman stands between two people that are fighting.

You don’t have to put up with that family member. | Katarzyna Bialasiewicz/iStock/Getty Images

If a family member consistently makes trouble for you and the rest of the family, it could be a sign that you need to part ways. Unfortunately, some people thrive off drama and creating chaos, a personality trait that Psychology Today refers to as “crisis-prone.” This person jumps from one disaster to the next, whether they started the problem or feel the need to blow a situation out of proportion. It can be exhausting if you have a family member with this type of personality. If the roller coaster never ends, you might want to consider distancing yourself.

Next: This is a huge red flag

Trust issues

A mom feels left out of a family celebration.

You might not be able to trust all family members with the latest gossip, but they should always have your back. | ElNariz/iStock/Getty Images Plus

Not being able to trust a family member is a huge red flag. Perhaps you have an aunt who constantly gossips about you behind your back. Or maybe you have a sibling that has stolen money from you. Heck, maybe one of your parents is a perpetual liar.

Whatever it is that makes this family member untrustworthy, it puts a lot of pressure on you and your insecurities. What’s worse is that you can develop trust issues with everyone in your life. If the rest of your life is being impacted by this untrustworthy person, consider distancing yourself.

Next: The most disturbing sign to pay attention to

The most disturbing sign

A man lashes out at a woman while she loses her patience.

Be on the lookout for violent outbursts during family dinners. | Milan Markovic/iStock/Getty Images Plus

But the most telling sign that it’s time to cut contact with a family member is if they harm you, or have the potential to do you harm. We aren’t talking about the friendly rough-housing that brothers often engage in. We’re talking about legitimate bullying, clear-cut violence, or verbal abuse that makes you feel unsafe.

BullyOnline explains that serial bullies within the family are masters “of manipulation, and are fond of manipulating people through their emotions … and through their beliefs, attitudes and perceptions.”

Next: How your health might be at risk

Maintaining this relationship puts your health at risk

A woman lies down on her couch while looking upset.

Family drama can put your health at risk. | Tommaso79/iStock/Getty Images

This kind of toxic family relationship can manifest into a variety of health issues. Psychology Today explains that any type of toxic relationship “can turn into exactly that — a toxic internal environment that can lead to stress, depression, anxiety, and even medical problems.” One study even found that maintaining this relationship can negatively impact your heart health and put you at risk of cardiac arrest.

Next: It’s not easy, but …

We know it won’t be easy

A family enjoys an outdoor meal together.

You might notice a more positive vibe. | Monkeybusinessimages/iStock/Getty Images

As we stated in the beginning, cutting a family member out of your life is not an easy task to undertake. “When we cut out a key family relationship from our life, it takes quite a bit of energy to keep that emotional door closed,” tells us. Although it is difficult, it is important to remember that severing ties could be better for everyone involved.

Next: Where to get help

When you need help

A woman sits down with a therapist.

Consider family therapy. | Shironosov/iStock/Getty Images

Hopefully other members of your family can come to your aid for support. (It’s possible that the rest of your family is having difficulty with this relative, and you all can support each other.) If relying on family isn’t an option, there are many other outlets that cater to victims of abuse and other family issues. is just one example of a hub that can help when you need assistance cutting a family member out of your life.