CS: What is the best way to get over the heartbreak and move on?
JP: The best way to get over the heartbreak of being cheated on is to first realize that it was very much beyond your control, and that the cheating is more about your spouse than it is about you. This takes a long time, a lot of introspection, therapy, and other healthy life choices to figure out. I know countless men and women whose spouses cheated on them. They got divorced and are now in very happy, fulfilling relationships with someone else! It just takes time, patience, and the ability to let go of the past.
I think that people who don’t get over being cheated on are the ones who play the victim — the ones who never stop talking about how much their ex ruined their life. Being cheated on is like anything else in life that happens to a person, that is to a large extent out of your control. So, treat it like, ‘this was the card I was dealt. Now, how do I handle it and become happy again?’ instead of ‘my life would have been perfect if so and so never cheated on me and we were still together.’ He or she is gone, so let yourself have a big pity party, and then it’s time to get it together and figure out the life you want. It’s not easy! But countless men and women I know have been cheated on and are now in other relationships and blissfully happy!