Criminal and Former Tyco CEO Dennis Kozlowski: Amazed at Decline of Free Enterprise

The Hypocrite of the Day Award goes to … drumroll please … criminal and former Tyco (NYSE: TYC) CEO Dennis Kozlowski. I had all to do to keep from bursting into cardiac arresting and laughter when I just read the letter the imprisoned Kozlowski sent to Fox Business Network (NYSE: NWSA). Here are some really fun and delusional excerpts:

“I’m amazed at the decline of our free-enterprise system. Failed businesses received bailout money and then bonuses were paid to those who failed – all at taxpayer expense and no one has been prosecuted….”

“In 1976, we began a strategy to grow Tyco. We focused on a few basic industries and ultimately created tens of thousands of jobs for manufacturing people, pipefitters, electronic technicians, foundry workers, health-care employees, engineers, salespeople and many other blue-collar and white-collar workers.

“We raised capital, invested the money acquiring companies and improving them and provided superior returns for well over 20 years. A look at the state of business in America today leads one to conclude it would be impossible to achieve similar growth and related job creation.

“Back in 1976, we (Tyco) were a small company seeking to buy another company (Grinnell Fire Protection) about four times our size. We did our diligence, tested our assumptions, anticipated what could be improved and purchased the company (the first of many). We knew we were putting our jobs at risk if we failed. There were no bailouts for a mistake or just plain luck.

“Today if we were a small company seeking similar opportunities we would be stopped in our tracks. We would have to assess the cost of a 2,300-page health care bill that we could not decode or price. New regulations as a result of stimulus bills and unknown tax policies would make cost too uncertain. The tens of thousands of decent paying jobs we created, in industries some believed could not be competitive in America, would not happen.

“The small business managers seeking to grow – the true creator of jobs – has now been set up for failure. (We grew our revenue from 20 million dollars to 40 billion dollars and employees from less than 1,000 to well over 200,000.) Today there are too many unknowns with a government addicted to spending , revenue extraction from business and individuals, and overreach policies.”

For Kozlowski’s next act to, he might entertain us with his very own Declaration of Independence from jail. Happy Fourth of July!