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Billie Eilish is an American singer and songwriter who has been a force to be reckoned with in the music community. Eilish first entered the mainstream pop scene and is best known for her successful debut single, “Ocean Eyes.”

Eilish, a native Los Angeleno grew up with a family of musicians and has spoken about how her upbringing influenced her creative process greatly. She is the subject of an Apple TV+ documentary chronicling her experiences as a musician. The film marks the first time Eilish has been candid about her former romantic relationship with another musician.

Billie Eilish on the red caarpet
Billie Eilish on the red carpet in 2019 | JEAN-BAPTISTE LACROIX/AFP via Getty Images

Billie Eilish talked about her past relationship in her new Apple TV+ doc

In the documentary, Eilish begins things in a relationship but is single at the end. Fans were intrigued to discover as the film aired that by the end she was single, prompting a deeper dive into the cues given throughout the documentary. Eilish opens up about her relationship with musician Brandon Quention Adams, who she calls Q. She shares the decision was difficult but ultimately the right thing to do.

“I just wasn’t happy. I didn’t want the same things he wanted and I don’t think that’s fair for him,” she said. “I don’t think you should be in a relationship super excited about things that the other person couldn’t care less about. I don’t think that’s fair to you. I don’t think that’s fair to him. There was just a lack of effort. I was literally like, ‘Dude, you don’t have enough love to love yourself so you can’t love me, dude. And you don’t. [laughs] You think you do.'”

Eilish spent time trying to think she could make things work on her own to no avail.

“I do love him though, which made it harder,” she continued. “I’m not over him, I didn’t find someone else,” she adds. “I didn’t stop having love for him. I just spent time away from him for a little bit and I was like, ‘Wow I’m missing so much because I’m worried about you all the time and I don’t want what you want and you don’t want what I want.’ I don’t want to fix him. I can’t fix him. I tried.”

The documentary gives fans a glimpse at Eilish like they’ve never seen before

Eilish also includes some of the trials and tribulations of the relationship in the documentary, sharing times when the two were at odds.

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Eilish recounted, “I was just like, ‘You know what? Have fun. Don’t worry about me,” she says. “I’m miserable, and I miss you, and I wish you would talk to me, and I have no one else to talk to.”

Though by the end of the documentary she is single, Eillish’s raw depiction of her prior relationship gives fans a deeper glimpse into her life which many have appreciated. Billie Eilish: The World’s a Little Blurry is streaming now on Apple TV+.