How Do Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld Make Their Marriage Work?

Jerry Seinfeld and his wife Jessica attend the CFDA Fashion Awards
Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld | Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images

When Jerry Seinfeld had his hit sitcom, Seinfeld, his character was forever a bachelor. We loved watching the hilarious antics of his character stumbling through relationships in New York. But the real Seinfeld lives a very different life. He and his wife, Jessica Seinfeld, have been married for almost two decades and share three teenage children. How did Seinfeld manage to create a life so different from his character? And how does he manage to make a Hollywood relationship last? Let’s take a look. 

How did Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld meet?

When these lovebirds met at a New York gym, Jessica wasn’t exactly available. In fact, she was a newlywed who had just returned from her honeymoon. But something about Seinfeld caught her eye and she couldn’t forget him. She ended her marriage, started dating Seinfeld, and the rest was history. 

When Oprah asked Seinfeld about meeting his wife, he explained it in a different way than we’ve ever heard before. “It’s not the conversation or the attraction that you feel,” Seinfeld said. “It’s just like this comfort level when someone comes into your house. When they’re in your house and you’re still comfortable. I don’t know what it is, but it’s just like this is someone I want to spend my life with.”

The secret to Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld’s healthy marriage

When asked about his relationship by People, Seinfeld said that the length of time was key. They’ve been together for almost 20 years, and it took them a full ten to really figure out what they were doing. But that’s not the only secret to a happy marriage according to this couple. 

“It doesn’t matter if anyone’s right,” Seinfeld explained. But Jessica elaborated by giving another reason: travel. She explained that they both travel for their work, so that means they have to really work at communication, because they aren’t able to see a lot of each other. 

“I think the travel in the beginning was an adjustment for you.,” Seinfeld said. “I think looking back it’s a healthy thing to have the breaks.”

But don’t misunderstand that to mean this couple doesn’t like spending time with each other. In fact, it’s one of their favorite things. Seinfeld said, “Every night for us is date night. We just like to hang out and it’s not like a big deal for us to go to a restaurant. It’s just about being the same room for us. We love being in the same room.”

The Seinfelds are both dedicated to their careers

One of the ways these two bond is through work. They’re both incredible dedicated to their career. Jessica explained to People, “We are not codependent. We both have a very strong work ethic and a huge passion for our work.”

Seinfeld has been working on his Netflix show, Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee, which features him picking up another comedian and riding around town in very fancy, expensive cars. So far, the show has received an excellent response. 

Jessica writes cookbooks, and has a charity foundation called GOOD+ Foundation, which provides items to families in need throughout New York City. Jessica admits that in the beginning, what made her decide to start working so hard was Seinfeld’s traveling. He wasn’t around, so she had to fill her time in some way. 

“That made me work harder,” she said to People. “I think that made me want to really fill my time. We both want to raise normal children because we both grew up in middle class homes, and so we know that it’s really important for our kids to see us working really hard at work we love and so I think that adds a lot.”

These two each have their own projects to keep them busy, so they’re not dependent on each other for entertainment. That means when they do come together, they can really use that time to enjoy each other’s company. Jessica said it best when she said they’re not “co-dependent,” and maybe that’s the secret to all relationships?