Kristen Stewart Once Revealed ‘Twilight’ Fans Made Her Feel Like She Didn’t Exist

Kristen Stewart’s career catapulted to new heights after starring in the popular Twilight films. But although the movies made her more popular than ever, the Twilight fandom also made her feel like she didn’t really exist.

Kristen Stewart once revealed she experienced panic attacks dealing with her ‘Twilight’ fame

Kristen Stewart posing at a theater.
Kristen Stewart | Theo Wargo/Getty Images

Adjusting to the newfound A-list celebrity status that Twilight gave her proved to be a difficult time for Stewart. After the franchise’s monumental success, the young actor found herself attracting more attention than she could handle. This led to Stewart experiencing an overwhelming amount of stress with physical consequences.

“I had panic attacks. I used to puke every day and very casually too. Luckily I never suffered from an eating disorder; it wasn’t to do with that. I always had a stomach ache. And I was a control freak. I couldn’t anticipate what was going to happen in a given situation, so I’d be like, ‘Maybe I’m going to get sick.’ Then I’d be sick,” Stewart once said in an interview with Elle.

But Stewart eventually learned how to overcome this anxiety and better handle the low points of fame.

“I changed, that’s the thing – at a certain point I realised that the fear was death, but I had gone through so much that did not kill me and… Sorry, I know that sounds dramatic,” she said.

Kristen Stewart once felt that she didn’t exist because of ‘Twilight’ fans

Ironically, although Stewart had more eyes on her than ever before thanks to Twilight, the actor also felt she wasn’t really seen. In 2012, Stewart starred in another successful supernatural film in Snow White and the Huntsman. She agreed to do the role because of how much she related to the titular character Snow White.

“There’s so much that Snow White has been deprived of in terms of having the proper time to really develop and hone who she is,” she once said in Interview magazine. “She’s put in jail at the beginning of her life, so she’s a stunted person..”

Stewart was able to identify with Snow White’s idealized concept of the world because of the character being trapped. To the actor, it was similar to how she felt regarding Twilight.

“There is something…It’s not the reason that I wanted to do the movie, but the fans and people who loved Twilight, they do put you on this sort of different plane where you’re not real,” she continued.

To clarify, Stewart agreed that she felt more like of an ideal to Twilight fans than an actual person.

“It’s like you don’t exist. And Snow White doesn’t exist,” she explained.

Kristen Stewart once felt that she had to prove she was more than just her ‘Twilight’ character

Twilight once gave Stewart a tremendous fanbase. So much so that even after the actor had dabbled in other roles, some fans couldn’t separate her from Bella Swan.

“Of course, there are people who so genuinely love the Twilight movies and books that they’ve said, ‘Every single time I see you in a movie, you’re still Bella to me.’ It doesn’t bother me. I just say, ‘Fantastic, you’re a big Bella fan. I can totally relate. I’m a fan of Bella, too,’” Stewart once said in an interview with Hollywood Life.

At the same time, she also shared that stripping off the character wasn’t an easy task.

“I do think people assume that I’m Bella. I have to prove to them that I can do other things and that she was just a character,” she said.

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