Former ‘Millionaire Matchmaker’ Stars Rachel Federoff and Destin Pfaff Tell Us Their Love Story and Offer Relationship Advice
Have you ever looked at a couple and wondered how they found each other? What was it that brought them together? One couple, former Millionaire Matchmaker stars Rachel Federoff and Destin Pfaff, took the time to chat with us and share their love story. The relationship experts and founders of Love and Matchmaking also gave us some of their best relationship advice. Here’s what they had to say.
Showbiz Cheat Sheet: Tell us your love story and how you met.
Rachel and Destin: We met online on one of the original social networking sites–Myspace! We honestly couldn’t tell you who “stalked” who, but we became friends and were friends for over two years. Destin lived in LA and Rachel lived in OC and would frequent the same nightspots, but always missed each other.
When we finally did connect, Destin was instantly in love and Rachel, well, not so much. Our birthdays are coincidentally a week apart and at Destin’s birthday celebration he asked Rachel for a kiss, she obliged, and it was magical. Time seemed to stop for both of us. The love song “It’s in His Kiss” is 100% true! We use our love story in our practice and suggest our clients always go in for or accept a kiss after a date!
CS: What has been your secret to lasting love?
R & D: Communication! Hands down the most important component in any relationship is always dialoguing with each other. Relationships are doomed to fail if you aren’t open, honest, and expressive! Love is work–and worth every minute of it.
CS: What advice would you give to singles who are about to give up on love?
R&D: To quote Tim Allen, “Never give up, never surrender!” Love is everywhere–whether hiding in plain sight, or two clicks away on an app. Most of us are lucky enough to fall in love once, many get blessed to be able to do it twice. As humans we are beautiful, complicated creatures who have the maddening ability to get in our own way.
Free yourself of overthinking, unrealistic expectations, frustrating rumination and bizarre requirements. When you shed the unnecessary desires and stop comparing the world to your ex or your neighbor’s perfect relationship or your best friend’s unhealthy dating habits, you will allow the universe to give you your turn. But remember, you must seize it when it comes!
Lose the shyness, the fear and the doubt. Give yourself, and them, a chance! First step? Delete all your dating apps, stay away from friends with bad habits, purge all ex-related items and get happy with yourself. Once you’re clean, the magic can start to happen!
CS: What are the best ways to cope on Valentine’s Day or other days that seem to be focused on couples if you’re fresh from a breakup?
To some, Valentine’s Day is a bad word, but it doesn’t have to be! Just because you’re newly single doesn’t mean the day marked to celebrate love has to [be a downer]! Use it as your launchpad to the new you! This will be the day you take you out! Whether it’s a movie, or drinks, or a spa day–it doesn’t matter.
Make sure the focus is on you and not on the rumination of the past relationship. Then, purge your social of all references to your ex. Delete them from your phone (including pics), sell any stuff they gave you on eBay, and use the money to buy yourself something fun (or go on a trip!), and open a fresh dating profile that really speaks to your positives–because you have plenty! Dwelling, waiting, whining–these are all the worst things you can do!
CS: Anything to add?
Whether you’re single or in a relationship, Valentine’s Day does not have to make or break you! It’s just another day, but one that can be used to empower you! Love yourself, and love will come!
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