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In his memoir Spare, Prince Harry recalled a fight where he “snapped” at Meghan Markle, admitting he was “sloppily angry.” Meghan suggested he find a therapist to work on himself.

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle attend a promotion for the 2023 Invictus Games.
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle | Rolf Vennenbernd/picture alliance via Getty Images

Prince Harry revealed a big fight he had with Meghan Markle

In his memoir, Prince Harry shared the details of a fight with Meghan that ended up being a wakeup call. “Maybe the wine went to my head. Maybe the weeks of battling the press had worn me down,” Harry wrote in Spare.

“For some reason, when the conversation took an unexpected turn, I became touchy. Then angry. Disproportionately, sloppily angry,” he continued.

Harry went on to explain that Meghan had taken a comment he made “the wrong way,” which led to him to speak to her “harshly” and “cruelly.”

He explained, “Meg said something I took the wrong way. It was partly a cultural difference, partly a language barrier, but I was also just over-sensitive that night. I thought: ‘Why’s she having a go at me?’ I snapped at her, spoke to her harshly — cruelly.

Meghan Markle said ‘she would never stand for’ the way Prince Harry spoke to her

Prince Harry felt the severity of the situation mid-fight. “As the words left my mouth, I could feel everything in the room come to a stop,” he wrote. “The gravy stopped bubbling, the molecules of air stopped orbiting. Even Nina Simone seemed to pause. Meg walked out of the room, disappearing for a full fifteen minutes.”

He said he found her in the bedroom. “She was calm, but said in a quiet, level tone that she would never stand for being spoken to like that,” Harry recalled.

He continued, “I nodded. She wanted to know where it came from. I don’t know. [She asked] ’Where did you ever hear a man speak like that to a woman? Did you overhear adults speak that way when you were growing up?’ I cleared my throat, looked away. Yes.”


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Meghan’s comment prompted Prince Harry to seek therapy

Meghan had a hard stance after the fight, telling Harry she wouldn’t “tolerate” that kind of treatment. Her words prompted Harry to seek a therapist.

“She wasn’t going to tolerate that kind of partner. Or co-parent. That kind of life,” Prince Harry wrote in Spare. “She wasn’t going to raise children in an atmosphere of anger or disrespect. She laid it all out, super-clear. We both knew my anger hadn’t been caused by anything to do with our conversation.”

Prince Harry was aware that the situation came from a build-up of frustration and knew that he had some work to do on himself if he was going to be with Meghan.

“It came from somewhere deep inside, somewhere that needed to be excavated, and it was obvious that I could use some help with the job,” he explained in his book.

“‘I’ve tried therapy,’ I told her. ‘Willy told me to go. Never found the right person.’ [It] didn’t work,” he wrote. “‘No,’ she said softly. ‘Try again.’”