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Facing the holidays after a loved one has died can make grief more intense than ever. Some people who have lost a loved one will avoid the holiday, finding it hard to celebrate joy or happiness in the season. But psychic medium and reality TV star Matt Fraser says forgoing the holidays is exactly what your departed loved ones want you not to do.

But Fraser acknowledges that the holidays are a tough reminder that your loved one is no longer with you. “The toughest part of the holidays is the fact that every single time we sit at the dinner table, we notice the people that aren’t there,” he told Showbiz Cheat Sheet. “We all go through grief and this is something that nobody likes to talk about. Nobody ever likes to hear about this. And it doesn’t matter how much faith you have, how much you believe in the other side. Doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter what your goodbye was like with your loved one.”

“We all go through grief and there’s certain points within our life when things happen, when we’re attending a birthday, a celebration, a holiday when we think of that special someone, and all of a sudden that grief comes rushing back,” he continued. “And that’s the hardest thing of the holidays because it’s an amazing time with our friends and our family. It’s also a really sad time because we’re missing the people that are no longer a part of our lives.”

Psychic Matt Fraser reveals what the spirit world tells him about grief during the holidays

Fraser said it’s natural to want to avoid the holidays, which bring more pain and grief. And while that’s a normal reaction, the spirit world wants their loved ones to celebrate.

Psychic Matt Fraser stands on a wooden bridge with his hand on the rail
Matt Fraser |Alpha Creatives

“There’s one thing that the spirit world always tells me is they wish that they could come back and just tell their loved ones one thing. They wish that they could tell their loved ones that they truly were at peace, that they were OK. And that they wanted them to continue living life,” Fraser said. “Like all of my readings, all of my messages have that in common.”

Spirits come through to Matt Fraser even more during the holidays

“And what I want you to know is that during this time is when our loved ones are the absolute strongest,” Fraser said. “I mean, right now, for me as a medium, this is my busiest time of year. And it’s not because of my clients. It’s because of the souls that are on either side. Because during this time, there’s actually a heightened activity with the spirit world of all of these souls that are trying to reach their family members here in this world for that reason.”

“Because right now, I don’t care where you live in the world when the holidays come around, everybody all at once, they’re thinking about their loved ones that have passed on,” he shared. “And when we think about our loved ones that have passed on, when we say, ‘I really wish my dad was here right now. I really wish my grandmother was here. I really wish that my sister, my brother was here.’ Literally, you’re calling upon that soul. You are sending that message to that soul. And that soul is also trying to reach you. And I can feel it going on right here, right now, every single day.”

Why does the spirit world want you to make new memories?

“So what I really want to show people is that if you’re missing your loved one on the other side, remember this. They might not be here in the physical world. But, if you watch the work that I do, I can assure you that your loved ones are with you through life,” Fraser insisted.

“And when our loved ones leave this world, your eyes become their eyes. What your loved ones really want to see is you spending time with your grandkids, spending time with your son, spending time with your daughter, creating new family holidays, creating new family traditions, making new memories. Why? Because your loved ones in spirit get to enjoy that time with you.”

“The worst thing for loved ones in spirit is to see us sad, to see us crying. And the reason why, is if you think about it, if you had my eyes, your loved ones in spirit are not sad, they’re not crying, they’re not in heaven worried,” he explained. “They’re not in a strange, unfamiliar place. They’re with those they love on the other side. And what spirit always tells me is if they’re at peace on the other side, then we can be at peace here in this world. We just have to know it within our heart.”

Psychic Matt Fraser explains how grief ‘disguises’ itself

“So even though it might seem uncomfortable to you, celebrating the holidays, creating those memories, spending time with those you love, it’s something that you have to do because it’s part of that journey in grief,” Fraser said. “And one other thing is grief disguises itself. And the reason why is that a lot of people don’t realize that they are going through grief.”

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“But grief takes all of the happy memories of our loved ones,” he continued. “It takes all the things that we know in our heart. Like, for example, before your loved one passed, you might have believed fully in your heart with heaven. Before your loved one passed, you may have fully believed in the other side, the spirit world, the spirit communication, and all of those good things. But the moment that a loved one passes away, grief makes us rethink things. It makes us rethink ‘Is my loved one really at peace?’ Or. ‘My mom’s not here. She’s not sending me signs. My loved one is mad at me. My loved one is upset with me.’ All of these thoughts start to come in, but they’re not true. They are thoughts of grief.”

Psychic medium Matt Fraser is currently on tour and hosting virtual readings.