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Aidan Shaw was never the one for Carrie Bradshaw. Many Sex and the City fans are sure of it. In the end, Carrie ends up with Mr. Big, as intended. Still, Aidan was a big part of Carrie’s overall story. Should he have been, though? Frankly, it feels like Aidan let the relationship go on for too long. Three instances should have spelled the end for the ill-fated couple but didn’t.

Aidan should have broken up with Carrie when he thought she was smoking again 

When Aidan Shaw and Carrie Bradshaw first met, he told her he couldn’t date a smoker. Enamored by the furniture designer, Carrie agreed to quit, and their relationship began. By the time Carrie started her affair with Mr. Big, she and Aidan were spending most of their time together. Aidan knew Carrie was cheating; he just thought she was cheating when it came to quitting smoking. 

Aidan Shaw and Carrie Bradshaw are seen kissing on the steps of Carrie's apartment. Aidan was one of Carrie Bradshaw's boyfriends that fans either love or hate
Aidan Shaw and Carrie Bradshaw | Paramount Pictures/Newsmakers

Carrie did admit that she started smoking again. Instead of ending the relationship then and there, Aidan gave her another chance to get things right. In theory, Aidan should have ended the relationship when Carrie didn’t quit smoking like she said he would. Smoking was a boundary for Aidan, and Carrie crossed it. Technically that should have been reason enough to end their romance. 

Aidan should have ended the relationship when Mr. Big showed up at his cabin  

After Carrie admitted to sleeping with her ex-boyfriend, Aidan did the only reasonable thing and broke up with her. Their relationship appeared over and done with, but they eventually got back together. Carrie wanted to be with Aidan, but she wasn’t willing to give up Mr. Big completely, as evidenced by her behavior in the season 4 episode, “Belles of the Ball.”

Sarah Jessica Parker and Chris Noth stand outside of Carrie Bradshaw's apartment in season 6 of 'Sex and the City'. Carrie Bradshaw's hair journey had come full circle.
Carrie and Mr. Big | Debra L Rothenberg/FilmMagic

In fact, her “New York Ex” was a serious point of contention in the relationship, and Carrie refused to see Aidan’s side of things. Aidan Shaw should have called it quits when Carrie invited Mr. Big up to his country home after a movie star broke up with him. Carrie’s decision to extend an invitation to Mr. Big proved she didn’t respect Aidan. It was also proof that she still prioritized Mr. Big over her actual romantic partner. 

Aidan Shaw definitely should have ended things when Carrie refused to wear her engagement ring on her finger 

Aidan Shaw let a lot of things slide, and fans of Sex and the City have spent years debating why he was such a pushover. The smoking, the affair, and the continued communication with her affair partner weren’t enough to push Aidan over the edge. Carrie’s refusal to wear his engagement ring should have been, though.  

Sarah Jessica Parker hurries down the street while on the set of 'Sex and the City' in 2002. Carrie Bradshaw's hair is the shorrtest it has ever been in the series during season 5
Sarah Jessica Parker as Carrie Bradshaws | James Devaney/WireImage

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In season 4, Carrie accepted Aidan’s proposal, but she was never really into the idea of marrying him. She proved that when she refused to wear her engagement ring on her finger, opting instead to wear it around her neck. Aidan should have called it quits then and there. Instead, he issued an ultimatum a couple of episodes later. Their relationship ended for good in season 4, but Aidan Shaw should have ended it a lot sooner.