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Candace Bushnell’s name has been floated for years as a cast member to join The Real Housewives of New York City. And while Bushnell seems like a perfect fit for RHONY – she’s friends with most of the cast – she said there’s no way she’d do reality television.

Bushnell recently explained why she would rather watch reality television than be on reality television. She was involved in the infamous, “Not well b****” line delivered by Dorinda Medley. Bushnell also lives down the street from Luann de Lesseps. And while she loves her friendships with the RHONY cast, she’d rather keep them off-camera and explained why.

She’s not a fan of the whole ‘4th wall’ on reality television

Bushnell said the trips and dinners look enticing. Until you actually encounter them and then it’s not a lot of fun. “I mean, it looks like such a fun thing to do, doesn’t it?” she said on the Behind the Velvet Rope with David Yontef podcast. “You go on a trip, of course you have to ride around in those damn buses all the time. Like, OK, it’s a glamorous bus, but it’s still a frickin bus, but you know, you go on private planes and you go on vacations, you stay in places.”

Candace Bushnell and Luann de Lesseps attended Verdura Celebrates the Hearst Castle Preservation Foundation in 2017 and posed for a photo
Candace Bushnell and Luann de Lesseps from RHONY | Patrick McMullan/Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

“But the thing is, I mean, first of all, when I went to Ramona’s [Singer] house, I got into trouble,” she dished. “I got yelled at by the producers because they said I was breaking the fourth wall. It’s like, OK, I didn’t know there was a fourth wall in TV, but OK, we’re good. But you, you know, there are tons and tons of producers.”

She said you ‘can’t do whatever you want to do’ on a show like ‘RHONY’

But the fourth wall wasn’t the only issue. She said the fights and being told what to do was not appealing. “It’s a little bit like going to school, you know, where you got teachers and they’re going to tell you what to do,” she said. “I mean, you really, you can’t do whatever you want to do. It looks fun, but that’s why I’m like, ‘Hmm. I don’t know.'”

“Plus I really don’t like yelling at people or conflict,” she added. “That I can’t do. And you know, I know Ramona. I’ve known Ramona since the eighties and I’ve known Sonja [Morgan] since the nineties. So you know, I don’t want to be getting into fights with Ramona. I’m just not going to do that.”

Dating on ‘RHONY’ is tough too

She also said trying to date is pretty impossible while being on the show. “I think it’s really hard to find a partner when you’re in those situations,” she said about RHONY. “And what makes it harder is that they’re heterosexual women. So heterosexual men don’t tend to like that power situation. Then, I mean, I’ve seen this happen a lot, you know, straight men, they don’t really feel that comfortable with like, oh, the woman’s getting all the attention.” 

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“Then it’s not just that it’s that then people also make assumptions about that, about them. You know, like, oh, you must be like this if you’re with her,” Bushnell said. “And that seems to be something that straight guys don’t like so much.” She added that it’s different if you’ve been married to the person for years.  

“But it’s hard to find that relationship like right out of the gate,” she said. “You know, if you’re starting all over and they are, they only know you as you know, this person. And a lot of guys don’t like that either.”