‘Sex and the City’: One Fan Points out Just How Toxic Aidan Shaw Really Was

Sex and the City fans were thrilled to see Carrie Bradshaw end up with Mr. Big when all was said and done. He, however, wasn’t her only noteworthy romance over the course of six seasons. Carrie also dated the loveable Aidan Shaw. In fact, she almost married him. While most fans agreed that Carrie didn’t belong with Aidan in the long run, they all seemed to agree that Aidan was sweet. One fan, however, has a different view of the furniture designing love interest, and when you consider Aidan from a different angle, he was kind of toxic.

An Instagram account laid out everything that was wrong with Aidan

EveryoutfitonSATC, an Instagram account devoted to documenting every outfit that Carrie, Samantha Jones, Miranda Hobbs, and Charlotte York wore during the series, took the time to explain precisely why they didn’t care for Aidan, not only as a boyfriend for Carrie but a boyfriend for anyone.

Sarah Jessica Parker (Carrie) and John Corbett (Aidan) in "Sex and the City"
Sarah Jessica Parker (Carrie) and John Corbett (Aidan) | Paramount Pictures/Newsmakers

The account holder noted that Aidan made a bad impression from the start. Aidan, upon first finding out Carrie was a smoker, wrote her off. Sure, he has a right to decide what vices he will and won’t accept in his life, but he gave her an ultimatum about it. She fell for it, hook, line, and sinker, too.  

EveryoutfitonSATC also noted that Aidan held Carrie’s cheating against her, considered cheating on her to even the score, and tried to control who she could and could not spend time with. The big issue with Aidan, however, seemed to be his proposal, or, more so, why he proposed. Aidan made it clear that he wanted to marry Carrie to lock her into the relationship.

There were a few other issues with Aidan

While EveryoutfitonSATC did a good job of outlining the problems with Aidan. There were a few more instances that kind of make him a jerk, but in that subtle way that is hard to call out. During Aidan and Carrie’s initial courtship, he eventually admitted he didn’t want to sleep with someone unless he felt an emotional connection. That’s a perfectly acceptable way to approach dating, but Aidan didn’t bother to tell Carrie.

Instead, he let her drive herself crazy, trying to figure out if they were a couple or if they were just friends. His communication skills, in general, needed some work. He also refused to admit he was angry about Mr. Big calling Carrie during their second try at a relationship. Instead, he carried on about meaningless issues, just to avoid exposing that he was feeling threatened.

He badmouthed Carrie after they broke up

When the relationship eventually came to an end, Aidan was obviously hurt. Steve Brady admitted that he brought him chicken wings because he couldn’t get out of bed. Ultimately, though, Aidan got out of bed and back on the dating scene. That should have been the end of it, but obviously, he spent time badmouthing her to his next romantic interest.

Aidan’s behavior in his next relationship was so bad that his date couldn’t contain her look of contempt when she ran into Carrie in a bathroom. Nina Katz, the face girl, ran into Carrie over and over again, and her facial expression never got better. While fans never find out exactly what Aidan said to her; clearly, it wasn’t good.