The 7 Funniest Scenes From ‘Seinfeld’, Ranked

The NBC sitcom Seinfeld is undoubtedly hilarious. Even years after going off the air, fans still enjoy watching reruns on repeat and quoting the most memorable one-liners that Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer made famous. Most viewers agree that the “golden era” of Seinfeld occurred between seasons 3 and 5, which is when some of the funniest bits come from.

However, not every joke landed, even for Seinfeld. There are 7 scenes that stand out as the absolute funniest ever created during the show’s run.

Seinfeld cast
Michael Richards as Cosmo Kramer, Jerry Seinfeld as Jerry Seinfeld, Jason Alexander as George Costanza, Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Elaine Benes | NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal via Getty Images

Jerry goes up against a telemarketer

No one enjoys unsolicited calls from telemarketers, which is why this bit from season 4 is so hilarious.

In it, George brings an NBC executive over to Jerry’s apartment so the comedian can pitch his comedy show to the network. But Jerry gets caught up in a phone call with a telemarketer and doesn’t even try to be polite. It’s a classic example of Seinfeld reflecting real life but somehow making it funnier just by talking about it.

George flubs his comeback

Fans had to know that an episode called “The Comeback” would probably include a not-so-stellar insult, and they were right. It’s targeted specifically toward anyone who thinks of great retorts hours or days after the argument ended.

In the episode, George gets into an argument with a coworker and that’s exactly what happens. Later, George sets up a situation where he can deliver the perfect one liner but lamely says, “The jerk store called, and they ran out of you.”

Jerry plays nice with the thief who stole his car

Seinfeld on the phone
Jerry Seinfeld and Michael Richards on ‘Seinfeld’ | Wayne Williams/NBCU Photo Bank

RELATED: Jerry Seinfeld Says This Was His Sitcom’s Funniest Scene

Getting a car stolen is no laughing matter. But somehow Seinfeld made it so with their episode “The Alternate Side” when Jerry gets on the phone and tries to reason with the culprit who took his vehicle. Their conversation is inane and unlikely which is a huge reason why it’s so hilarious.

Kramer even convinces the car thief to return his gloves. It’s the perfect example of Seinfeld’s exploration of human nature with all its inconsistencies.

George experiences shrinkage

One common phenomenon men never talk about is shrinkage, but Seinfeld dared to go there. In “The Hamptons,” Jerry’s girlfriend accidentally sees George naked after he was in the pool and laughs at the small stature of his penis. He defends himself, saying, “The pool was cold!”

This spurs a whole conversation about shrinkage being a real issue for men.

Jerry wears a puffy shirt

If there’s one piece of clothing that represents Seinfeld overall, it’s got to be Jerry’s puffy shirt. Jerry dons the iconic apparel prior to a television appearance at the urging of Kramer’s girlfriend Leslie, but Elaine just laughs at how ridiculous her friend looks. The shirt was modeled after “what pirates used to wear,” and it shows.

The shirt remains a popular design and an undisputed symbol of the show.

Kramer loses ‘The Contest’

It’s frankly amazing that “The Contest” made it past television sensors since the entire episode centers on masturbation. However, no one actually says that one word, which actually makes the whole thing funnier. Instead, the four friends attempt to become “masters of their domain” by refraining from self-pleasure for as long as possible.

 A female nudist moving in across the street makes the challenge much more difficult for the guys. In one hilarious scene, Kramer retreats to his apartment for a few minutes, returns, and announces to everyone he lost the bet. It’s raunchy but not overt and as always, very, very funny.

George’s marine biologist speech

The mark of a funny scene is the show’s co-creator himself citing it as his favorite. Jerry Seinfeld said he most loves “The Marine Biologist,” the one where George pretends to be a marine biologist to impress a woman and winds up actually saving a whale.

“We got very lucky,” Seinfeld said of writing the scene. “Larry [David] and I came up with it the night before we were shooting. We wrote it late at night, and Jason memorized the whole speech in one day.”

One of the best moments from that episode is hearing George’s completely made up speech about rescuing a whale that’s intentionally dramatic and sensationalized. It’s almost impossible not to laugh hearing George say, “The sea was angry that day, my friends” or when he holds Kramer’s rescued golf ball aloft.