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Gilmore Girls is a mostly beloved TV series, but the show still had storylines that were almost universally despised by fans. Rory Gilmore’s decision to sleep with her married ex-boyfriend is one of them. Rory and Dean Forrester’s clandestine hookups are largely blamed for Dean’s divorce from Lindsay Lister less than a year after their wedding. While we get how Rory gets some blame for the whole situation, we don’t think she was to blame for their divorce, not even a little bit. 

Dean Forrester is the one who sought out Rory Gilmore and lied to her 

Rory is largely blamed for the demise of Dean and Lindsay’s marriage. Lindsay was hurt by the betrayal, and we felt for her. Still, we think Rory was a victim in the situation, too. While Rory harbored some feelings for Dean, she didn’t really act on them. He was the one who regularly sought Rory out. Dean called her with his cell phone number, and he was the one who tried to maintain a connection, despite Lindsay’s discomfort. 

Rory and Dean stand outside of Dean's house in season 5 of 'Gilmore Girls'
Rory and Dean | Netflix/Gilmore Girls

Dean lied to Rory to get her into bed. The once gentlemanly Dean told Rory he and Lindsay had agreed that their marriage wasn’t working. It was a lie. While Rory made a huge mistake by jumping into bed with Dean, we can see how his fib might have made her feel OK about the decision. 

Dean and Lindsay were clearly having issues regardless of Rory’s involvement 

Dean and Lindsay’s relationship was odd from the start. The couple dated for just six months before they decided to get married. They were barely out of high school when they tied the knot. It shouldn’t come as a shock that the duo was having problems shortly after moving in together.

Arielle Kebbel appears on 'The IMDb Show' in 2018. Kebbel famously played Lindsay Lister on 'Gilmore Girls'
Arielle Kebbel | Rich Polk/Getty Images for IMDb

Dean and Lindsay fought in front of Lorelai Gilmore and Sookie St. James. While it was pretty mild, it proves their union was troubled. Lindsay made it clear that she was unhappy. Dean alluded to issues before he hooked up with Rory, and Lindsay confirmed that they did nothing but argue when Dean returned from Rory’s house the night of their first sexual encounter. Sleeping with Rory was certainly problematic, but it wasn’t the first or even the second indication that their marriage was on the rocks.  

The marriage would have ended anyway, even if Rory hadn’t slept with Dean 

Perhaps most importantly, Lindsay and Dean would have likely divorced without Rory’s involvement. Dean didn’t seem remorseful when he returned home from his first hookup with Rory. He didn’t even seem particularly sorry when Lindsay learned of the affair and ended their marriage. We think Dean would have cheated on Lindsay with someone else eventually or ended the marriage for some other reason. 

Dean Forrester and Rory Gilmore in 'Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life'
Dean and Rory | Neil Jacobs/Netflix
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Gilmore Girls: Was Lindsay Lister Supposed to Be the ‘Villian’ in Her Marriage to Dean Forrester?

Dean jumped into marriage without truly understanding what he was doing. When the harsh reality of married life hit him, he looked for a way out. Rory and their complicated past made for a convenient out, but if Rory hadn’t been there, we are sure someone else would have. Rory was just as much collateral damage as Lindsay Lister if you think about it.

We agree she shouldn’t have slept with Dean. We agree that her attempts to rationalize the hookup were wrong. Still, we don’t think Rory was to blame for Dean and Lindsay’s divorce.